First Date
ESSENTIAL! Print out a copy of this page and take it with you.
Would you like a date? Or ten?
Preparation for the first date:
Both partners buy each other a gift costing up to NIS 5. No judging, just have fun with this. The possibilities are endless!
First date:
During this date you each choose three of the following questions to ask your date:
- What is something you love to do?
- Can you see my aura?
- Do you prefer guys with beards or without?
- What’s your favourite perfume/aftershave?
- What’s something really exciting you did this month? This year? In your life?
- What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever done?
- How do you feel about toads?
- How long have you known your best friend?
- What is one of the most beautiful things you’ve ever seen?
- What’s one of your favourite things? (This question basically covers all “What’s your favourite…” questions that you might have ever considered asking.)
- What is your least favourite question?
Forbidden Questions:
- How much money do you make?
- How much money does your father make?
- How often do you shower?
- Do you own your apartment?
- How many kids do you want?
- Where do you want to send your kids to school?
- How many brothers and sisters do you have? (Well, I don’t think that’s such a bad question. : ) Deena) (all right, ask it if you have to..Vera)
Freestyle
Yes, we allow you time to just talk. Enjoy. Get to know each other. Even if you’re feeling like this person isn’t for you, it’s still an opportunity to learn something new. And, if the date isn’t going too well, we’re sending you out with a special button. It’s called…
The Reset Button!
Do you have the key to reset? (Corny!)
If you’re not feeling good about the date, like it’s going in a totally wrong direction, you have several options:
- Be extremely rude (Not recommended. Be nice.)
- End the date quickly (Recommended in the case of possible axe murderers, but maybe this date still has potential so lets not get ahead of ourselves, please.)
- Call out RESET! (what does that mean?)
With reset you make a conscious decision to try to make things better. Here’s how you can do that:
- Call out “RESET!” (Let the other person finish their sentence, please.)
- Change places (not metaphorically, physically)
- Each of you asks one of the following two questions. You’re allowed to ask the same question.
- What is something (or someone) that has inspired you and why?
- What’s something really fun that you’ve done?
You can call RESET as many times as you like during the date – but don’t be mean!
If someone calls RESET while on a date with you, consider if maybe you’ve been talking too much or if, in some other way you’ve been making the other person uncomfortable. But also realize that it’s not all about you. It could be also just be strained dynamics between the two of you. A date, in a way, is like two worlds colliding. It’s not necessarily something that will just go smoothly.
What happens next? Click here for post-first-date!
* Please comment below to tell us what else you’d like to see on a first date.
Date photo by jemasmith at flickr.
Reset photo by renaisancechambara at flickr.
Deena
Vera Resnick
Sorry, but I’m dissapointed with this list of questions and suggestions… too many of them are too silly. I wouldn’t want to be asked most of the questions above or be made to get up in the middle of my coffee. In an ideal world, dating would be a fun thing to do – you go out to a nice place, meet an interesting person and have fun. This isn’t an ideal world. I’ve been on too many dates, answered too many strange questions from questionable people, and on the first date, I’m just aiming for pleasant, not original – that can come later.
If this site is meant as a fun way to pass the time while waiting for Mr.\Ms. Right, then of course, please disregard my comment. If you seriously want to help, concrete suggestions would be good. There are many people who really don’t know what to talk about on the first date, which may be why they are still dating after all these years.
Hey Long-timer,
Thanks so much for taking the time to share your thoughts and opinions with us on the topics we’re discussing here. Our lists and rules are a definite work in progress. As we explain in our About page, one thing we know for sure: Something has to change. What? How? We’re trying to figure it out. But there are so many bad feelings connected to the dating world and it’s just so hard for those of us who end up dating for years with the goal of marriage but without reaching that goal. Something has to change. We need to at least try! (Please feel free to read the About for more of our thoughts behind the site.)
That being said, our questions are based on a certain idea. The idea being that feeling a bit more light-hearted while on a first date might open up people more. Since you have proclaimed yourself a long-time dater, I will assume you have been on many first dates. The more first dates we have to go on, the harder it is (at least that is my experience). So, imagine if something could change about that first date that somehow made it not as big a deal?
Do you have ideas of questions you think could be helpful to bring out the best in two strangers thrown together for a couple of hours, both having either really high or really low expectations of each other? : )
One more thing: All changes are very difficult and because the current norm is different than the rules we’ve written here, it’s hard to imagine them. But I wonder, if this did become the new norm, then how would it feel? In other words, we’re considering these new rules within the current accepted norms. If the accepted norms changed, maybe it wouldn’t seem so weird? Maybe dating could be more enjoyable. Don’t we all wish!
Vera and I would love to know: What do you wish was different on a first date?
Please continue to read and comment. Very nice to hear from you. Good luck!
I’m for change – but does it have to include childish games? If you’ve asked these questions on your last date and you and your partner enjoyed it, then please share the experience and I’ll be willing to hear more. Talking about the latest books \ movies \ lecture is not original but I may learn something and it’s a fairly neutral topic.
I’m very impressed with your site, but I can’t help the feeling that instead of focusing on making dating fun you’re focused on making your web site funny.
Long-timer, we really appreciate the time you’re taking to tell us what you think. Your feedback is very important and we want you to know that we are seriously discussing what you said and deciding how we can make the site better using your feedback. Thank you so much for making an effort to share your thoughts with us!
Also, by the way, in the blog (the front page) there are posts by me and by Vera. I tend towards seriousness and Vera towards humour (though both our posts usually have serious ideas behind them). If seriousness attracts you more right now, you can always focus more on my writing. As for the rules, we’re spending a lot of time on them right now, trying to figure out how to improve them.
Thanks!