I forgot to mention that we got another mention. It’s in a blog post of 45 articles of dating no-nos – what not to do, say or wear.
Thank you, datingsite.org!
I dunno if this is newsworthy but it excites me so there. I wrote a blog post about OKCupid, a relatively new and extremely innovative dating site. I emailed them a link so they knew that someone was writing about the Jewish aspect of their site and I just noticed that they added a link to my blog post on their press page!
Shkoiach. Shkoiach. Bruchim tihiyu.
Andrea Simantov is hosting me on her show “Give me a break” on Rusty Mike Radio. The topic today is “The shidduch crisis.” :) Tune in now so you don’t miss hearing my beautiful voice. Click on this link and then click on “listen live.”
The show is every Wednesday, 1-2pm Israel time.
The talkbacks on my article in the Jerusalem Post are so strange, almost surrealistic, that we’re starting to wonder if it’s a form of secret service communication in code. A few comments related to marriage but seemed to be written by people who had never experienced single life in the bitza, some cast aspersions on my mental and emotional health and writing abilities, not to mention my lack of credibility as a married person (no-one seems to know that I’m also an alien) but most seemed totally unrelated to the article itself.
Much of the feedback I got in person from people was positive, so I’m not personally wounded by those who didn’t like the content, style or subject. In any case, I expressed my opinions and people are fully entitled to agree or disagree. But if you do feel the article presented a possibly true picture, and if it raised questions you would like to see taken seriously – add your voice to the talkbacks and the rating!
I wrote an opinion piece on Singles and Community which was published in the Jerusalem Post today under the title “The Big Fat Lie”.
First of all, in the name of all others who are horizontally challenged like myself, I have to state that the headline wasn’t mine! In principle, I never use the words “big” and “fat” to describe anything negative…
I hope the article opens up the issue of more singles, later or no marriage, less children, to a much broader debate than “what are the singles doing wrong”. I hope it will send out ripples into the broader community, and lead to more awareness that for the rewards community can bring people need to be brought into the circle, not segregated out because they are single, or elderly, or childless, or married…
As (almost!) always when I write something I become super-critical of it. It’s important for me to stress that I feel the concept of “blame” is irrelevant, possibly even laughable (might make you feel better if someone is blaming you…). I don’t feel marrieds or singles are to blame – I do feel it’s relevant to look for what has happened in society and community over recent decades to see what might have triggered the dynamic that has intensified over the years. Over to the social historians on this one!
I am going to be on Rusty Mike Radio today! Mimi is doing a show about singles and dating and I’ll be interviewed at around 3pm Jerusalem time. Click on the radio’s site and then click on “Listen Live,” a button in the middle, closer to the top of the screen, in order to hear my beautiful voice.
Eek!
We are so excited that we’ve been quoted in an article by Yael Brygel in the Jerusalem Post (in the In Jerusalem section and online at jpost.com) called Swamped with Singles, about the very popular Israeli TV show, Srugim and the Katamon singles scene! This is the link to the full article and here is the quote about us:
RECOGNIZING THE large number of singles in Jerusalem who may be grappling with some of the issues that being single entails, two Jerusalemites, Vera Resnick and Deena Levenstein, have created the Web site habitza.com, a forum for discussion about single life and the dos and don’ts of the dating scene.
“One of the ideas is to clear up gray areas and misunderstandings, to reach some sort of consensus,” explains Resnick.
While some people may be reluctant to refer to the single phenomenon as a problem, feeling as though this may create a stereotype about what it means to be single, Levenstein, who is single, uses the term openly to describe the singles phenomenon.
“The problem is that people want to be married and they aren’t,” she says. “My research is done at Shabbat meals. I often ask people if they want to be married, and most say that they do. The question that I ask is ‘Well, then, what is going on?’ One guy said there is a lot of taboo around the whole topic. He said that it is seen as bad to admit that there is a problem or to even use the word ‘problem.’ In general, we live in a time where you don’t call anything a problem.
“To me, I wonder what is wrong with admitting that there is something wrong. I know it makes you more vulnerable, but I think it is really important. When he said there is a lot of taboo around it and the more we talk about it the better, I thought that for me right now the place to do so is habitza.com. I see the Web site as a place for talking about almost everything. I think it is a place to talk about it from a humorous perspective, from a philosophical perspective, about all the issues that surround it. In my ideal world, I would want habitza.com to be one of the resources when it comes to this topic of singles dating for marriage, and everyone who is about to enter the dating world for marriage or just dating or who knows someone who is part of it will know that this one of the places they should go,” says Levenstein.
Photo by pingu1963-waiting for my new computer! at flickr.
Well, we’re feeling mighty famous today! We’re being featured in two major websites. Check it out and feel free to spread the HaBitza word!
At Bangitout.com (a NY based site): The art of Shabbat invitation hinting
At Jerusalem Blueprint (a Jerusalem based site): Habitza.com: Dating rules in Jerusalem, by Rebecca Markowitz (Thanks Rebecca!)
Also, we’ve started a twitter account and a facebook fan page. Feel free to check those out as well as tell the whole entire world about them. :)
