Why is it like that? Why is it that there is at least the tiniest bit of a cringe whenever you happen to bump into almost anyone you’ve ever dated? Somewhere is the hope that one or both of you will look away.
One of my goals is to create a situation where people are hurting each other less in dating. Quite a few times when I’ve said that to people, they get a little bit of a confused look on their faces. They don’t understand which hurt I’m referring to.
Well, if we’re all doing just fine, why all the awkwardness? If we’re all treating each other wonderfully, then it shouldn’t be so hard to bump into each other. Half of Jerusalem shouldn’t have potential for uncomfortable moments.
Objectification. I think that’s what’s going on. When you go out with someone, you see them, at least on some level, as an object that might fill your needs, like a brain to kibbetz with, a womb to hold your baby, strong arms to carry your bags, that person who will be there for you through thick and thin (um, you don’t even know them yet!). You guys are supposedly getting to know each other in the most innocent of ways, human to human, but there is actually a lack of humanness in the process which leads to uncomfortable partings, when the object is finally discarded.
We all know that breaking up is hard to do because so many different feelings are involved, but it’s more extreme than necessary.
Do you agree? In which ways do you think people create hurt in the world of dating? How do you see yourself and people around you hurting each other in the context of dating?