HaBitza

I’ve never specifically endorsed any dating site in the past since for the most part they are all the same structure. Sign up, look at profiles, pay if you want to contact someone or if you want to read a message someone sent you (besides supertova which is free). And the build of the profiles is almost identical on all the conventional dating sites.

But I keep telling people about OKCupid because it is such a different online dating experience and so I feel it’s time for me to write about it here.

It’s free.

First of all, it’s free. Free free free. Did I mention that it’s free? Moving on…

You get matches that are appropriate for you.

No, it’s not a Jewish website (I did not mean to mention that right after the free thing!). But it is set up in a way that you can really have it geared towards who you are. In all the time I’ve been on (a few months), probably 99.9% of the guys who have contacted me have been Jews living in Israel. The site automatically sends you suggestions and there too mine are always Jewish men in Israel.

This is not the only reason I think that it doesn’t actually matter that it isn’t a Jewish site.

It’s *gasp* enjoyable to use.

Dating needs to be made as enjoyable as possible. This site is headed in that direction. There is actually something funky and fun about the site and when you visit it, you might actually feel a little funky and fun yourself. Even if it’s a dreaded dating site you’re visiting.

I honestly think it would be amazing if more religious people came on because the whole site seems to be more conducive to meeting interesting people than other sites. I know it’s possible that if you’re on the site long enough, there too you’ll feel like you’ve milked it for all its worth but it just seems to be different people than I’ve seen elsewhere online.

Higher quality

One of the main issues I have with jdate is that the majority of people on it in Israel don’t fill out their profiles. You’re lucky if there is a freakin’ photograph of this supposed potential match. And then these people who couldn’t even be bothered to tell you one thing about themselves contact you. Um, hello? It’s a big world out there. I need something to go on!

For some reason, most of the people on OKCupid have taken the time to fill out their profiles. It is possible that it is attracting totally different people than the other dating sites but my main theory regarding the amount of info up about the “average” (Jewish Israeli male) user is that the profile is way more fun to fill out.

Yup, it’s a pretty different style than what we’re used to. The questions are more creative and that seems to bring out a creative side in people. It asks you questions like: What are the six things you couldn’t live without? And: I’m really good at… And: What I’m doing with my life (instead of: I work in…). You’d be amazed how people answer questions that are worded differently.

Actually, reading people’s profiles can be an amusing past-time there! :)

The Google of online dating

OK, I’ve exuded enough enthusiasm but one more thing that is important to mention about OKCupid. It has been called the Google of online dating by the Boston Globe. This, I think, is because they are going all out figuring out algorithms for putting the “right” people together. They are taking the huge amount of information they are getting from the activity on the site and analysing it to understand what different kinds of people like, etc. They have a blog that is actually quite fascinating to read. Warning, it can be a little un-religious at times but if you’re up for it, I definitely recommend taking a look.

You can read about all the (very young!) people behind this enormous project on their about page. Wow they’re young!

Look, it’s new to me so maybe that is what makes it that much more exciting than the Jewish dating sites but I don’t think so. It is a very different experience for the better and tachles, I’ve met some interesting and nice people on the site, even if I have only gone out with a couple of them. I have found it to be a more quality experience than elsewhere.

And the minuses are:

I guess I’d say the minuses I have seen are that first of all of course you still must remember that people are people and not everyone is necessarily what they make themselves out to be. I went out with one guy from there who I was very excited about from his profile and then I felt like he was a totally different person in person. I was actually freaked out by that experience and shied away from OKCupid for a couple months after that. It almost felt like because the site is conducive to cool profiles it’s harder to tell when someone isn’t so cool.

Another negative would be that it is obviously missing some questions that might be important to religious Jews. The amazing thing is, though, that anyone can create quizzes on the site and someone could create one about religious issues which could totally become popular amongst religious people.

And one more negative (and this will probably be the biggest negative for some women especially): You do have some pretty random people looking at your profile. I’ve had a couple of Jordanians check me out, for example. None have contacted me but if there is already something uncomfortable about having your pictures and information up for strangers to see, it feels quite a bit more uncomfortable when it is totally “random” people taking a peek.

I recommend!

Either way, in general, it’s a cool site and I see that it already has a lot of non-Orthodox Israelis on it. I can totally see it becoming a nice change for the more traditional or religious Jewish crowds too. Now just for someone to start the trend…

If you check it out, let me know what you think!

P.S. FYI, they already offer a search of only Jews. Also, a user named Nevuchadnetzar has created a “How Jewish are you” test. I think there needs to be a more religious one created (though from a quick peek at his profile he seems to be religious himself) but point is, it’s possible.