I saved you a date.
Since, as you all know so well by now, according to me a date is not “just a cup of coffee,” if anyone can ever save me from having to put myself through the difficult emotional process of going on a blind date, I am forever grateful.
Recently someone did just that. She thought of someone for me. She’d spoken to him on the phone and he sounded pretty cool, sweet… But after telling me a bit about him, she immediately offered to meet him before setting him up with me. And immediately after meeting him she got back to me and said that she’d saved me a date and told me why (the why doesn’t matter here).
Granted, basically having someone else go on a first date for you can make you feel a little like you’re losing control. Thoughts like, “Yeah, but maybe that wouldn’t have been a problem for me,” creep in. But the main thoughts are, “Thank God I got to go on one less date.
To be clear, there is nothing wrong with most of the guys I’ve ever gone out with. It’s more the emotional roller coaster inside of me that I must endure. And if I can endure it one time less, that is very good for me.
I told this woman that her meeting the guy for me or for any other girl is a huge chessed (act of kindness). She is really taking action and responsibility in her attempt to help singles find the “one” to marry.
Kudos to her.
What if the guy really liked her, a lot?
Good point. Not sure how well this would work with single friends. She is married. It wasn’t literally a date, just a meeting. To me, though, it’s as if she went on the first date instead of me having to go.
As she is married, I wouldn’t even call her meeting with him a date. I would call it an interview. Many shadchanim insist on in-person meetings with a person before they set them up.
Ariella, I know it’s confusing that I call it a date but I’m just trying to get my point across that it really is as if she went on the first date for me, instead of me.