How to behave on a first date – not..
How to behave on a first date: (anyone been on one of these? my sympathies)
Be horrible
Be rude
Be unpleasant
Be loud
Flirt with the wait staff
Flirt with anyone else around
Slurp your soup
Play with your food
Eat with your mouth open (even though in some cultures apparently this is appealing…depressing.. )
Make a fuss over the bill
Talk about yourself non-stop without showing any interest in the other person
Demand to know if they are frum enough
Insist that you’re frum but cool
Boast about the people you know
Boast about the people you’d never hang out with
And if anyone calls you on this – just say:
“I was only trying to be myself!”
By the way – this is meant to be satirical. Please don’t take me seriously. This is not serious advice on how to behave on a first date. Or on any date. Although sadly some people do feel that being married to someone entitles them to do all of the above – but I digress.
What do you think? I think being on your best behaviour is probably a safer bet. If you want a second date, that is…
How about how to learn how to act when dating in the frum world, when previous dating (decades before) were done as a secular Jew?
This is indeed a complicated issue – I’ve spoken to other guys who are dealing with this, and it’s really a case of learning a whole new set of rules. Not just that, you also have to learn to interpret your date’s responses differently, especially if she’s always been religious – it’s like learning a different language. It’s really best for you to speak to others who have been in a similar situation, ask them how they adapted, what they did. Wishing you luck in your search.
Be on your best behavior?! But isn’t that a recipe for ruin as well? Sounds to me like a first date is a lose-lose situation.
Thanks for a great article. That’s a very good list of things not to do on a first date. I’m sure it could act as a tick list following the event. I wonder which one is endured most often? Probably the “talk about yourself non-stop…” and the boasting.
I’ve written a blog article with some humorous questions not to ask on a first date:
http://www.chasinganoodle.com/2010/02/questions-not-to-ask-on-a-first-date/
This is fantastic. I liked reading this.