End the good impressions!

A couple days ago I wrote a piece about how we are too nice on dates. The more I think about it, the more logic I find in that idea. Someone just told me that when she started hanging out with the guy she ended up marrying, they weren’t really interested in each other and so their guards were down. The first time they hung out they ended up arguing about different issues. They had such a good time that they started hanging out together.

There are certain ways we act in “regular” social settings that don’t happen as easily in a date setting. If someone says something you disagree with, then in a regular setting you’ll very possibly say something while in a date setting you might let it pass since you don’t want to confront the person and seem difficult.

But with this couple, because their relationship started off from that open place, they were really able to get to know each other and they saw that they liked each other despite the fact that at first they didn’t.

Getting annoyed at someone for something they say on a date is pretty scary. You don’t know how they’re going to react and if it’s going to mess up any chance of things working out with that person. Maybe you’ll even end up with a tainted image. You’ll be the girl who beats up guys on first dates.

Better stop beating guys up!

Anyway, in my opinion it all boils down to believing that your beshert is your beshert and davka if you act like yourself then you will more easily find your beshert. We don’t really need to be putting on shows.

Yikes.